So what I may have failed to mention last post, was that on our tour around Pilanesburg, there was a 2 year old having a day long nervous breakdown in the car, sandwiched between me and my sister in law. They do not beleive in seat belts or car seats here so I was punched, sat on, snotted on and screamed at most of the time. I was also over tired so everything he did caused me to secretly lose my mind. Needless to say my Uterus hopped out of the car and fed itself to the lions. Remember when I said last year that kids are so much more behaved here? I 100% retract that statement completely. It was perfect timing that after this trip we were scheduled to stay with Hennie’s parent for a couple days-hurrrah peace and quiet! (Super quiet actually…)

Staying there was fun. We watched Days of Our Lives everyday, which was a riot seeing Hennie’s parents really get into the storyline even though they didn’t really know what was going on as they couldn’t here it and they couldn’t read lips as it was in English. Staying with older people is fun because afternoon naps were totally acceptable and in fact encouraged. We watched Cricket as well which just seemed like a clusterfuck of rules and not much happening…but people were so into it! After hours of Hennie trying to explain to me how it is played, I told him it was too retarded for me to learn and that was that. SO COMPLICATED!

Hennie’s parents also took us to the Voortrekker Monument and museum. A museum of the history of Hennie’s people.SO MANY ASIAN TOURISTS!? The great Trek sounded like a bloody, religious battle for the Afrikaaners, which hasn’t really changed at all. People are so matter or fact about the violence here (and are still uber religious)! We hung out with his cousin today and he told us how he had been stabbed last year while someone tried to rob his car! The group just nodded like he was telling us about how much the price of ham was. Everyone has a story of either being attacked, knowing whole families that have been murdered or knowing people that have died in car accidents. It’s creepy. I had always told Hennie I would happily live here but I think he realizes I would be too paranoid too. Everytime I see the cleaner and the gardener meet up in the front yard I am sure they are conspiring. (On a serious note) This is how the hatred starts I imagine. I refuse to be a part of it but the racial hatred in this country is kind of insane. It makes me shocked to see where Hennie has come from and how he has not held onto any of these traits he was so obviously raised with. It’s upsetting everyday. Hennie and I are the only ones that thank any black person that has served us, helped us park, put us through their cash at the supermarket or anything else.  

Ok rant done.

So I watched a whole movie in Afrikaans, I basically know the language. It’s a whole lot of throat noises, with some english words thrown in and facial expressions that make me think I know exactley what’s going on. I have started subconsciously throwing some of the slang into my sentences and Hennie is well impressed. Plus I eat meat like it’s going out of style (I ate meat stuffed with meat yesterday!) so I am an honourary Afrikaaner (minus the racist part). The quote that has summed it up for me was Hennie’s cousin saying “I am not racist at all! I have no problem letting black people into my house…to clean. No problem at all!” I cringed and decided to tuck that back into my pocket for later discussion.

Did anyone else know the President of Nigeria’s name was Goodluck Jonathon? What parent pops out a child and thinks, Good Luck! You will need it…That will be the childs name.

We passed a sign for a gyneocologists yesterday and the name on the sign was DR. WILLIE!! A gyno! Bloody brilliant!

We have been told by a few people that we have to try a South African style sticky toffee pudding. It’s called Mulva. Which rhymes with Vulva. So when we were walking through Woolworths (the top of the line, posh grocery store here) I remembered and yelled to Hennie downt he aisle “Don’t forget the VAGINA CAKE!”

P.S-I have heard Hennie twice now say “back home”, which he has always said about SA, but now he is definitely referring to Canada! Ha ha sucker, I got you! You are Canadian now!