Nothing like settling in from a big trip only to go on a mini work road trip to Toronto!

Sara (my boss) and I have this down to a fine art. We both bring kale chips and coolers full of fruits, veggies and water, with the best intentions…only to stop at the first chip stand we see for fries or pass by it saying we are healthy and get fries later at A&W instead.

We got off to a late start so when we finally got to Toronto, it was a mad dash to see the three stores we had planned. At one point we were in such a rush to get to one store that I was sure we could beat Siri’s time. “Siri says 8 minutes but I am sure we can make it in 5! Siri is being overly cautious. Forget her. Pedal to the metal girl, Pedal to the metal! DRIVE FASTER!” Of course we made it to the store, only to find out the buyer we were trying to catch was there for another few hours and we didn’t need to rush at all.

We had free styled booking a hotel (and by free styled I mean we hadn’t booked one at all). Sara was sure it wouldn’t be an issue, as it was Tuesday night…well Toronto must be a very happening place because the first 2 hotels we tried were full?! Finally the guy at reception of the last place called another hotel, just down the street, to see if they had room. They had one left so we needed to be quick. The receptionist told us the parking could be tricky but he would help us by pointing it out on a map. He rips this giant Toronto map from a pad on his desk and draws a line to where we are going. Perfect! We get into the car, turn left out of the parking lot, drive 10 feet and there was the hotel. There we are staring at a giant map, getting all technical with the directions and the hotel was RIGHT THERE! He could have walked out from behind his desk, walked to the window and pointed at it. We laughed so hard Sara almost crashed through the parking gate that did not quite raise fast enough. The rest of the trip was just as hilarious.

I have been going through such Sons of Anarchy withdrawal that I have decided to re-watch all of them under the guise that my friend Erin should see them and I would watch them with her. I think Erin was onto my addiction enabling plan when as soon as the DVD started I just kept yelling HOT….SO HOT every time Jax was on the screen. I swear it’s the best show I have ever seen…EVER! I once told Hennie I was going to get the full Sons of Anarchy reaper tattoo on my whole back, he shook his head and walked away. 

I discovered the best summer ice cream treat ever yesterday! It’s dairy free and is made with coconut milk and is covered in almonds and some magical dairy free chocolate. It’s so good. I knew while I was eating it that Gwyneth Paltrow would approve. I’ve noticed, while faced with a food decisions recently, in my head I hear “what would Gwyneth do?” Maybe I should make bracelets that say WWGD. I know everyone hates her and here is why I empathize with her. If I wrote a blog about all the stupid, ridiculous shit I eat and all my many food intolerances, y’all would hate me too. If I gabbed on and on about natural cures for everything and moronic environmental crusades I go on, you would think I’m annoying as fuck. I try to keep it myself! I know sometimes it leaks out but I try to keep a lid on it! I am a gluten intolerant, vegetarian who can only eat some dairy and random foods can give me headaches for Gods sakes! I know! I’m fucking annoying! It was after my Dad called me a food fascist once that I knew I should just keep my food ridiculousness to myself. Which is why I try not to dwell on it when out or travelling. I try to fit in and then quietly suffer later alone at home. Gwyneth didn’t get the memo that people generally find that shit annoying but I don’t care…I like her. And her kid’s name is Apple which is awesome! My kid’s names will be Banana, Kale and Chia seeds…just because. Just kidding, am not having kids, I fed my uterus to the lion, remember?

My birthday is coming up. I’m calling it my ‘Holy Shit Birthday’ as I am going to be 29 which, in theory, means I have one year to get my shit together. I’m not sure it’s enough time! One year until I am thirty! Holy shit! Not cool! When did this happen! I still refer to things I did when I was 19 as ‘a few years ago’. Do I have to refer to myself as an adult soon?? Not cool.

P.S-I am so excited that people actually read this blog btw. Thanks to my loyal and wonderful readers. When I got back from my trip there had been 750 views on my blog! Which my brother Ben quickly told me, “ya but 595 of those views were Mom…you know that right?” Thanks everyone! xo